i am a little confused what a'm i?

Dragon's best matches are Rat, Monkey and Rooster. So you may any of these people to get marrried. I do not know what happened to you. But I feel that you are aimless and depressed. There is no time for you to waste your life. You need to have new goals in your life. When you have goals, you will do everything to make your goals come true. Then you won't have time to think about meaning questions. Come on! Make you busy and fight for your goals!