Mr.T,

We call it Caili (Bride Price) in Chinese. It varies from place to place. You may negotiate with your wife and your parents-in-law. In today’s China, most grooms still need to pay bride price to their parents-in-law.

Initially it was a house, now it is down to JUST 50,000RMB. I think it is too much. I am not wealthy. Her and her family are not wealthy nor are they poor. They are from Hunan. Please advice. Does anyone have a similar experience?

50,000RMB is not too much. I just heard that a girl’ uncle required the groom to pay 100,000 RMB as Bride Price. Then the girl’s mother disagreed and said that she was not going to sell her daughter. She just married her daughter to her beloved. If her mother is an understanding and sensible person, she would take your financial condition into consideration. Besides, all mothers hope that her daughter will marry a reliable man who loves her very much.

Not any more , it is up too the lady . I'm sure where ever you are going to the parents will visit you . Like wise you are to visit them , the exchange of money is illegal in China and if done in secret it would be ok , also depends on where you are marrying . Be careful as some ladies will take what ever you got , and divorce you at the first chance . Most ladies marry a western man for a move up in class , or for security , love , most ladies do not know what real love is in China , only what they read. My wife who is Chinese is a marriage consultation in Shanghai . You will give them a give a gift to the parents , it could be money . You ask your future wife I'm sure she will have an answer. The practice is old school China