I am earth sheep(1979) and my son is an earth rat(2008), wondering.

Sorry, but astrologically, there is total incompatibility between you and your son. You may need to seek advice from a psychologist. The only solution I could envisage is to get a helper who is compatible with you and with your son, and to whom your son will pay attention and listen. We adults do the same when we reach a stalemate with someone. We ask the help of a third person, who gets along with us and with the person with whom we don't get along. Good luck.