The name "Xiao Jie Pan"

Her name should be Pan Xiaojie. You can address her as Xiao Pan (intimate) or Miss Pan (respect).

Thanks! So, in this situation, would I use the "intimate" version or the "respect" version?

Thanks again, Buckle, butI just realized I'm still a little confused by your answer. Doesn't "Xiao" mean "Miss." If so, I don't see how they are different (except that one is Chinese and one is english). I thought that the surname came first and then the title, so wouldn't it be "Pan Xiao"? I've also read that "měinǚ" might be more appropriate these days and that sometimes these days "xiaojie" used alone can have an inappropriate connotation. The main thing is that I just want her to see that I am trying to give a little extra effort even though I don't speak any Chinese at all. I want her to know I took the time to find out how to say it correctly, hopefully surprise and flatter her a little, be respectful, and also get across my intentions (romantic) without being overly flirtatious or inappropriate. I know that's a lot to pack into a greeting! More background is that I have already had several conversations with this Beautiful Girl, so I know her a little. I'm not addressing a stranger on the street. She has lived in the USA for ten years, and I am American. My romantic heart tells me to say "Pan Měinǚ," but I've also read that pretty much *everyone* is called "měinǚ" these days, so maybe that diminishes the effect I'm hoping for (or maybe it's just right?!). I'm surprised how hard it is to find a simple answer online! I'm sure I'm over-thinking this, but love is on the line! Any help is appreciated!

Chinese people put the surname before the given name, so Pan must be her surname and the Xiao Jie is her given name.
Since you have known each other, maybe you can call her the intimate version, Xiao Pan. If in formal occasion, Pan Xiaojie may be more appropriate (Xiaojie here is not her given name but of the same pronounciation in Chinese, it means Miss).

It is recommened that you don't call her Meinv. Most girls may think you are flirting with them and doing so may leave a bad impression. And yes, you got it. People call every girl Meinv here, so it is not an innovation. Just avoid it.

Good luck!

I keep getting more confused! If I call her Xiao Pan am I calling her basically "Given-name Surname" or am I calling her "Miss Pan."? If it's "Given-name Surname," then isn't the order backwards? Also, whichever it is, please tell me which tone "Xiao" has! Thanks so much.

Based on your words, this lady's name is Pan Xiaojie. Pan is her family name and Xiaojie is the given name. You can just call her given name, Xiaojie, as you have talked with her before.
The word Miss in Chinese also reads as Xiao Jie which happens to have the same pronounciation with the lady's given name. So, this might confuse you the most.

Yeah, I agree with Judy. In her license, she put 'Pan' last maybe because of the system used in the US where surname is put behind the given name. So her name should be: Surname='Pan' and Given name= 'Xiaojie'. The given name might have different tones to the word for 'Miss' which is Xiao2 Jie3, so maybe check to see which characters her name uses. And lastly, I think the address someone suggested you use, Xiao Pan, is made up of Xiao3 which means small and Pan, her surname. It can get confusing when you type using pinyin without the tones as some words have the same pinyin and even the tone but uses different character.